When Adulting Is Hard

Hubby and I had a brief moment to chat this morning. Usually our conversations are light and breezy—and mostly about the kids—but today it was a bit heavier and profound. I think the older we get, the more of these latter talks pop up from time to time because, as I’m sure you know, adulting is hard.

What is adulting anyway? It’s not even a real word (I don’t think) since that red line keeps showing up under it as I type. But it’s a real condition or stage, however you want to call it. And with each passing year, it seems like this thing called adulting gets harder and harder to manage. Life becomes more complicated and responsibilities add up, and you face things you were never prepared for.

Adulting includes the big stuff like watching a dear friend struggle for her last breaths in a hospital bed; not knowing how to help a family member fight mental illness; attending four funerals in a year; and losing a baby to miscarriage.

Adulting also includes the everyday stuff of taking care of your family even though you are bone-tired; figuring out how to support friends going through crises; working hard to pay the bills; and juggling the care of your young children as well as your aging parents.

Adulting is a lot of things, but the one thing it isn’t is easy. This morning when I was sharing my frustrations with hubby, he said just what I needed to hear: The most important thing in life is honoring God. Through whatever we go through—the ups and downs—we can’t lose sight of the reason why we’re running this long and windy race. And even though we may not understand why things happen the way they do or how to make sense of disappointment or pain, the one thing we can hold onto is the fact that we’re not alone. God is with us through it all.

I was reminded of a song by Rich Mullins, “Hold Me Jesus”. I had the chance to see him in concert in college, and hearing him sing live was such a moving experience. You could tell from his lyrics that his relationship with God was honest, raw and sincere. He hadn’t figured everything out yet about life, but it was okay. He just wanted Jesus to hold him through it all.

Well, sometimes my life
Just don’t make sense at all
When the mountains look so big
And my faith just seems so small

CHORUS:
So hold me Jesus, ’cause I’m shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won’t You be my Prince of Peace

And I wake up in the night and feel the dark
It’s so hot inside my soul
I swear there must be blisters on my heart

Surrender don’t come natural to me
I’d rather fight You for something
I don’t really want
Than to take what You give that I need
And I’ve beat my head against so many walls
Now I’m falling down, I’m falling on my knees

And this Salvation Army band
Is playing this hymn
And Your grace rings out so deep
It makes my resistance seem so thin

I hope that whatever you’re going through right now, you’ll keep your head up and your heart open. Even when adulting gets hard—and it often does—God’s grace is big and deep and full enough to see us through. Let’s remember to hold onto Jesus as He holds onto us.

What’s the hardest part of adulting for you?

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